Today...

Somehow the loss seems sharper this year.  I'm probably just kind of programmed to go by fives and this being the fifth anniversary brings it a little closer.  I want my kids to know someday, so I'll write here what went on with me personally.

I was at work like every other day and it had been a pretty good morning so far.  Relaxed, no big projects going, just a "coaster" of a day, really.  Just before break time the guy at the video test bench said "Some idiot just flew a small plane into one of the World Trade Center towers".  We all laughed a little.  How dumb/drunk do you have to be to miss seeing something that big out of your front windows?  

A little while later we all came in from the little area around the front door where some of us went for fresh air and sun and others went to get in a smoke.  As we got back to the benches a new report came in.  Another plane had hit the other tall tower.  This one was a big passenger jet (we still didn't know that the first had been, as well).  Suddenly everything was different.  The whole crew - even the Supervisor - stood there watching that little 15-inch TV monitor.  I remember we were all waiting for more information on the people in the buildings when the report came that the Pentagon had been hit, too.  Instantly everything focused sharply.  I can remember saying, mostly to myself, "Holy God, we're at war.  And we don't even know who with, yet."  Then came the story of the plane that had gone down in rural PA, flight 93.  They, at least had had the time and enough foreknowledge to fight back and prevent that plane from killing more innocent people.

Somewhere in there the President spoke to the nation and I was very glad at that moment that we had elected this man.  His voice was steady and matter-of-fact as he laid out the facts as they were known at the time.  But his face betrayed an inner Rage that gave hope that this time  Something Would Be Done.  Not a strongly worded no-no to the bad guys like after the WTC bombing, the embassy bombings, the USS Cole bombing, etc., etc., but an all out hunt for those who would do such a thing.  Not to arrest.  Not to capture, except to extract information from.  Not to reason with - they're far removed from that.  Only to bring swift justice.  To eliminate the threat.

The news was talking about tall buildings being evacuated across the country and we all felt like it just wasn't right to continue the work day.  We did though.  I don't know how much got done, but we all stayed there and put up a semblance of production at least.  More and more it felt like continuing was the only proper response.  They wanted to paralyze us, cause us to freeze up, and disrupt our society.  It worked to a certain extent, but not as well as they had hoped.  And then the anger set in.  I really don't believe  that they were ready for the hellstorm they unleashed as their operatives were rounded up or killed at an astonishing rate, driving their top people underground.  Literally in some cases.  They put forth videos on the internet and through friendly media sources claiming victory after victory from their remote caves in the mountains of Afghanistan and neighboring countries.

The sick part is, that part of their attack has worked far better than the rest.  There are large numbers of people in this country who have come to believe the propaganda of the bloodthirsty animals cowering in their holes over the first-hand reports of the troops on the front line.  Much of this probably can be laid at the feet of the media vultures who say bodycounts sell and put their own political view into what gets sent out to the masses.  These are the ones who will publish anything claiming the "public right to know".   So they freely tell the terrorists how to avoid surveillance and capture while denigrating our fighting men and women with any unfounded accusation the enemy accuses them of without any shred of evidence.  And all the while news of schools, power plants, and hospitals being built by US troops in former totalitarian countries goes unreported and news of the first truly free elections many of the citizens of those countries have ever seen is muted at best.

The terrorists can not stand against our military.  If they are just patient enough, though, they believe we will defeat ourselves with a media-sapped will to continue the fight and partisan recriminations that tear us apart from within.  We have no real choice but to prove them wrong.